To hate or denigrate our family is to hate on ourselves which has the unanticipated effect of lowering our self-confidence, creating a perception of unworthiness, and promoting illness. When we loathe our blood family for the traumas they have inflicted, we also cast ourselves out and loathe ourselves because our flesh and bones come from them. They are a part of us.
Are you overeating or choosing foods that are really rich when your life is lacking richness? Are you bored and stuck in a rut and food is replacing that need for adventure, joy, doing something new, exploration?
We do have a right to be upset, to be angry, to be sad, etc. and we also get to choose whether to take that frustration out on the other person and to carry that upset with us through the rest of the day and all of the interactions that we have or whether to respond to the upset from a grounded place that creates change so the situation isn’t repeated and we can release it then in the moment instead of harboring the hurt in our body. We can’t control what other people do, but we can choose how we respond to them and how we internalize the event.